Haiku

Fuck is you who? Who

Is fuck you? You is who fuck?

Is you the fuck who?

Wanna Hear Some Poetry?

Then Mia prompted me to come up with a poem for her.  I was like, WTF, nothing rhymes with your real name.  I decided to switch it up and write a haiku.  Here it be:

Tacos, abortions,

Puppies , and  jizz.  These are what

Come from Mia’s sniz.

Haifiveku

Her vagina is

Like a TARDIS: it is bigger

On the inside

RE: "Valley Girls" Gossip Girl Spinoff

It's nice to see that

Cynthia Watros is still

Getting work these days

Haifiveku

After I put on
My robe and wizard hat, I
Crave barbeque beef

Haifiveku

An open poem
To Tyler Perry: get the
Fuck out of Star Trek

Haifiveku

Bat For Lashes: She's
A watered down version of
Bjork for white people

Haifiveku

Although I'm not into
Her, Miley makes me feel
Like a pedophile

Haifiveku

I miss Fred Burkle
That Oprah is a liar
Thongs don't feel so bad