Showing posts with label cartoons. Show all posts
Showing posts with label cartoons. Show all posts
Monday, February 18, 2013
Friday, April 27, 2012
THAT Is A Wig, Storm
I started watching the X-Men anime and was delighted to find Wolverine mocking Storm's wig.
Sunday, April 22, 2012
Tekken: Blood Vengeance
I watched a fun movie this afternoon called Tekken: Blood Vengeance. It's a CGI movie based on the videogame series. Like the Final Fantasy: Advent Children movie, the fights were spot on, however the plot lacked severely. I found solace in capturing the homoerotic moments. Please enjoy.
Thursday, August 19, 2010
These Bitches Are Not Role Models
I've been thinking about this topic for a long time. Why do we think it's okay for little girls to look up to these so-called Disney princesses? Let's take a look:
Sleeping Beauty:
She never had to do shit growing up with those fat ass fairies. She lived a carefree life picking berries, singing songs, and dancing around. But oh no! That wasn't enough for her. She was too cock-hungry to be kept in that beautiful woodsy cottage. Her ravenous twat led her to that prince, and then what? Bitch got lazy and took a nap INDEFINITELY. She'd only get out of bed for some dick. Is that how you want your daughter to be?
Alice in Wonderland (I know she's not technically a princess, but she warrants an entry):
First of all, this bitch was crazy and a liar. Oh, she was also a raging drug addict trying to fill the void inside, as evidenced by her willingness to down any substance put in front of her with glee. You just know that she after she woke up, she was going to spout that nonsense to everyone around her and get her ass locked up. She'd get better, and maybe have a semblance of a normal life, but one day she'll snap again. She'll start eating random mushrooms she finds, and if those don't kill her, she'll mistake a semi truck for a caterpillar and get run the fuck over.
Princess Jasmine:
She was restless and tired of her pampered life in the palace. Yes, her father was overprotective, but he should be. Enemies would gladly snatch her up and hold her for ransom. her solution is to canoodle in the dirty streets of her city and fall in love with a homeless boy. That is hepatitis waiting to happen. Oh yes, she has a pet tiger too. We all know how well that turned out for Roy Horn.
Ariel:
Someone sent me this video yesterday, and it really hits on all the points I had to say:
Cinderella:
Talk about a broke down ho. This poor bitch saw fit to just accept her shitty life with her cunty step-mother and -sisters, and not do shit to fix it. RUN AWAY. Anything would be better than her servant life. She'd be better off as a whore. She talks to animals all day, and just waits for things to change themselves. Her only course of action is to disguise her disgusting ass as someone she's not and trick the prince into liking her. Classic.
Snow White:
She's another one who didn't do shit. She, what? Cooked? Cleaned? Fine, she was a homemaker for seven little men who were probably all boning her silly. She wasn't satisfied with one little person, she had to collect seven little cocks. Then she too gets all lazy and takes a nap in a glass coffin, waiting for some real dick to wake her up. What a cunt.
Pocahontas:
She disobeys her father and runs off with the white devil. This never leads to anything good. Everyone knows it was a mistake to help those assholes over her own people, but here we are. I won't even get into the real story of how she was really just a rape victim, yada yada yada.
Belle:
At least she was smart. She was a fine, bookish young thing, but once again, she wanted much more than her provincial life. It was rather selfless of her to exchange herself to save her father though. That's where the trouble began. She fell in love with an animal, and became the biggest furry of them all. Her bestiality will never be forgotten. You KNOW she was disappointed when he turned back into a human. "Sooooo. . . no giant beast cock?"
Tiana:
At least this slunt had a job. TWO jobs. She was working hard to one day open her own restaurant. In the end however, she's a gold digger and relies on a man (a prince of course) to make her dreams come true. What happens when she's a little older and run-down from working in her restaurant? She'll be aged beyond her years, and she won't have time to care for herself. Her wrinkly face and saggy tits will drive her man into the twat of a younger woman--probably a waitress/aspiring restaurateur at her own place. You know she didn't get a pre-nup because she married for love, and everything is in the prince's name. She'll be left out on her ass; and due to the years of stress, she became a mean old bitch, so no one will hire her. She's fucked.
There was however one decent princess. I was going to say two, but the more I thought about Tiana, the more I realized she sucks, so I moved her into the shitty section:
Mulan:
She was a butch dyke at worst and a tranny at best. Duh, of course she sould be a role model.
Sleeping Beauty:
She never had to do shit growing up with those fat ass fairies. She lived a carefree life picking berries, singing songs, and dancing around. But oh no! That wasn't enough for her. She was too cock-hungry to be kept in that beautiful woodsy cottage. Her ravenous twat led her to that prince, and then what? Bitch got lazy and took a nap INDEFINITELY. She'd only get out of bed for some dick. Is that how you want your daughter to be?
Alice in Wonderland (I know she's not technically a princess, but she warrants an entry):
First of all, this bitch was crazy and a liar. Oh, she was also a raging drug addict trying to fill the void inside, as evidenced by her willingness to down any substance put in front of her with glee. You just know that she after she woke up, she was going to spout that nonsense to everyone around her and get her ass locked up. She'd get better, and maybe have a semblance of a normal life, but one day she'll snap again. She'll start eating random mushrooms she finds, and if those don't kill her, she'll mistake a semi truck for a caterpillar and get run the fuck over.
Princess Jasmine:
She was restless and tired of her pampered life in the palace. Yes, her father was overprotective, but he should be. Enemies would gladly snatch her up and hold her for ransom. her solution is to canoodle in the dirty streets of her city and fall in love with a homeless boy. That is hepatitis waiting to happen. Oh yes, she has a pet tiger too. We all know how well that turned out for Roy Horn.
Ariel:
Someone sent me this video yesterday, and it really hits on all the points I had to say:
Cinderella:
Talk about a broke down ho. This poor bitch saw fit to just accept her shitty life with her cunty step-mother and -sisters, and not do shit to fix it. RUN AWAY. Anything would be better than her servant life. She'd be better off as a whore. She talks to animals all day, and just waits for things to change themselves. Her only course of action is to disguise her disgusting ass as someone she's not and trick the prince into liking her. Classic.
Snow White:
She's another one who didn't do shit. She, what? Cooked? Cleaned? Fine, she was a homemaker for seven little men who were probably all boning her silly. She wasn't satisfied with one little person, she had to collect seven little cocks. Then she too gets all lazy and takes a nap in a glass coffin, waiting for some real dick to wake her up. What a cunt.
Pocahontas:
She disobeys her father and runs off with the white devil. This never leads to anything good. Everyone knows it was a mistake to help those assholes over her own people, but here we are. I won't even get into the real story of how she was really just a rape victim, yada yada yada.
Belle:
At least she was smart. She was a fine, bookish young thing, but once again, she wanted much more than her provincial life. It was rather selfless of her to exchange herself to save her father though. That's where the trouble began. She fell in love with an animal, and became the biggest furry of them all. Her bestiality will never be forgotten. You KNOW she was disappointed when he turned back into a human. "Sooooo. . . no giant beast cock?"
Tiana:
At least this slunt had a job. TWO jobs. She was working hard to one day open her own restaurant. In the end however, she's a gold digger and relies on a man (a prince of course) to make her dreams come true. What happens when she's a little older and run-down from working in her restaurant? She'll be aged beyond her years, and she won't have time to care for herself. Her wrinkly face and saggy tits will drive her man into the twat of a younger woman--probably a waitress/aspiring restaurateur at her own place. You know she didn't get a pre-nup because she married for love, and everything is in the prince's name. She'll be left out on her ass; and due to the years of stress, she became a mean old bitch, so no one will hire her. She's fucked.
There was however one decent princess. I was going to say two, but the more I thought about Tiana, the more I realized she sucks, so I moved her into the shitty section:
Mulan:
She was a butch dyke at worst and a tranny at best. Duh, of course she sould be a role model.
The point is, don't let little girls in your life look up to these pieces of garbage. Slap the notion out of her, and tell her to get her ass on the stripper pole like any other child of a terrible parent.
Sunday, April 25, 2010
Of Course
My friend Brady always manages to find the nastiest stuff on the Internet there is. He searched for "moogle" images. They are these cute little creatures in the Final Fantasy franchise. So of course he happened across this picture:
Brady: wtf. how is this in the google image search for moogles?
me: only you
me: just leave it to you to find that shit
Brady: lol
Brady: so
Brady: I'm confused what is going on in that picture
me: i don't really want to enlarge it
Brady: lol
Brady: DAMN
Brady: who is getting boned thinking about moogles?
me: you
Brady: there are WAAAAAAY to many moogle penises on google images
me: ooooooh
Brady: : and there is one spreading its asscheeks
me: he has his little antenna thing in toad's ass
me: lol
Brady: : OOOOOOHHHHHHH
me: you sick fuck
me: like an anal bead
Brady: : HA
me: a singular anal bead
Thursday, February 25, 2010
Wednesday, February 24, 2010
Oh This One Too
I neglected to post this one. The more I watch, the more ingenius I realize all these dubs are. Some fantastic quotes:
"Yeah, we'll fuck him, rob him, then we'll go to Sizzler."
"Holy shitchrist on a cross."
"Out where they fuck, out where they suck, out where there's an endless supply of cocks that want to pee all over me, god I'm a whore."
"But if you lick my clit. . .don't forget. . . to also lick my asshole."
"This is the motherfucking dress I'm going to get motherfucking gangbanged in tonight."
"Fuuuuck. I can eat my own puuuussy."
"I'm on a motherfucking camel in the motherfucking desert."
"One day when you least suspect it, you WILL shit on me."
"You know the rules, only live things go in my pussy and only dead things come out."
"Faggots hate babies, and babies hate faggots. Everyone knows that."
"I prefer 'self-induced miscarriages.'"
"Let's go pro-choice a baby out of a bitch."
"Yeah, we'll fuck him, rob him, then we'll go to Sizzler."
"Holy shitchrist on a cross."
"Out where they fuck, out where they suck, out where there's an endless supply of cocks that want to pee all over me, god I'm a whore."
"But if you lick my clit. . .don't forget. . . to also lick my asshole."
"This is the motherfucking dress I'm going to get motherfucking gangbanged in tonight."
"Fuuuuck. I can eat my own puuuussy."
"I'm on a motherfucking camel in the motherfucking desert."
"One day when you least suspect it, you WILL shit on me."
"You know the rules, only live things go in my pussy and only dead things come out."
"Faggots hate babies, and babies hate faggots. Everyone knows that."
"I prefer 'self-induced miscarriages.'"
"Let's go pro-choice a baby out of a bitch."
Sunday, January 10, 2010
Fucktales
I was chatting with someone yesterday, and Ducktales came up. I had mentioned something about going around town setting traps with candy for little children, but I wrote "time" instead of "town." Hence the topic of Ducktales arose. You know, how Scrooge McDuck traveled back in time to abduct a cavechild in order to molest him? Obviously Scrooge was into kids because that's why Launchpad wore pants, but all the children had none. Then this gem was brought to my attention, please enjoy:
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