Poor Guy

I was at Walgreens earlier this week and the guy in front of me in the checkout line was buying Abreva. Look, I'm not going to judge this guy, he's just doing what he has to do, but here's the funny part: he was buying it with a coupon. That in itself isn't funny, but apparently the coupon was in some booklet, and the cashier was taking forever to find it. The poor guy was so cute and looked embarrassed. I wanted to say, "it's okay, baby, I'd still fuck you." Here's the lesson: never buy anything you would want to keep quiet with a coupon. The three dollars you'll be saving are not worth the loss in pride.

Get Your Learn On

Oops, it's been a while. I've been busy....well, occupying my time with lots of videogames playing. Final Fantasy XIII came out, and it's become a new obsession of mine. If you're a fan of RPGs, BUY IT. It's better than XII. the story is much more interesting, and the gameplay is more fun.

The point of this post is to learn a little history about the LGBT movement and to refresh your grammar knowledge. Let's get to the fun:




Varla was one of the main characters in one of my favorite movies. I highly recommend Girls Will Be Girls.

Manboy

Eric Saade. Check out this Swedish homo. I'm guessing homo of course. Why is he smiling so much? I can only assume he has some sort of vibrating toy up his ass that is causing him to grin so foolishly. This song is called "Manboy?" That is such a siren song to pederasts everywhere. Still I think he's really cute. I just want to hate fuck that stupid smile off his face.



Jizzplosion!

More Jenky Hair

Anna Kendrick was great in such movies as Up In The Air and Rocket Science, but I sniffed that hairline out in a millisecond. She's got that crazy shit that needs threading like Paris Hilton's ass after a gangbang. You remember Selma Blair don't you?

Happy Birthday, Brady!

The tinkle of broken glass and drunken laughter fills the air as you reach for the closest empty bottle of Bud Light (buy American!). DD’s hand closes around yours, sending a jolt of desire through your body. He flings the bottle off the balcony at someone he could only assume was a filthy Mexican living in this great country illegally, but really it is just a shitty faggot neighbor who likes to self-tan. DD kisses you roughly and pulls you into his bedroom. He wastes no time in unzipping his Levi jeans and pulling his thick cock out of his American flag boxers. He shoves it down your throat, making you swallow every inch of his country sausage. He pumps away mercilessly, then pulls out and beats you while calling you “Rodney King.” You go back to work on his sweet member as he pulls on his pointy white hood. DD increases his pace as he slams himself into your wide open mouth. He tilts his head up to look at the poster of George W. Bush he has fixed on his ceiling for just these occasions. He winks at it, rams his cock past your lips two more times and pulls out, telling you to get ready for the fireworks. He spurts all over your face, somehow ejaculating red, white and blue; he yells “party in the U.S.A.!”

Do The Right thing

"YOU JUST KILLED A HOBO!"

That's what I heard a little kid say to one of his family members at dinner tonight. Apparently he felt strongly that not finishing all the food on one's plate would be responsible According to him, a "hobo" is a person who doesn't have a car. Well, fuck you. You're a hobo too, you little pedestrian bastard.

KILL IT KILL IT KILL IT KILL IT

Oh This One Too

I neglected to post this one. The more I watch, the more ingenius I realize all these dubs are. Some fantastic quotes:

"Yeah, we'll fuck him, rob him, then we'll go to Sizzler."
"Holy shitchrist on a cross."
"Out where they fuck, out where they suck, out where there's an endless supply of cocks that want to pee all over me, god I'm a whore."
"But if you lick my clit. . .don't forget. . . to also lick my asshole."
"This is the motherfucking dress I'm going to get motherfucking gangbanged in tonight."
"Fuuuuck. I can eat my own puuuussy."
"I'm on a motherfucking camel in the motherfucking desert."
"One day when you least suspect it, you WILL shit on me."
"You know the rules, only live things go in my pussy and only dead things come out."
"Faggots hate babies, and babies hate faggots. Everyone knows that."
"I prefer 'self-induced miscarriages.'"
"Let's go pro-choice a baby out of a bitch."

Your Life Story

A Stroke Of Genius, Part II