Tuesday, February 17, 2009

HAPPY BIRTHDAY, LILA!!!

Alternative Title: I'm Clearly Going to Hell



All last week I made a point to remind myself constantly that a friend's birthday was approaching. As is often the case when something important arises, I fucked up. I missed out on her actual bday, and I feel like an ass. I'm sorry! I was trying to think of some unique story or joke I could post for her. Oh shit, I just thought of a terrible bday card. Absolutely inappropriate. Well now I have to do it.


Happy Birthday, Lila! I Hope Your Day Was THIS Special:






Or:
Hey, Sweety, Happy B-Day! Haven't heard from you in a while. I guess you had an Anna Nicole hell of a time!






And in case you're wondering who that is in the .gif, it's Goddess Bunny. She's somewhat of a cult icon, and she rocks. According to some sketchy web page, GB is a (new word time!) trannsy. Someone created a fake MySpace page for her. It's either really mean or (if she actually created it herself) genius.



Why does it always come back to trannies? This is some Number 23 shit. The meaning of life and the answer to every question isn't 42. It's TRANNY.



The point is I love you, Lila, and sometimes I wish you had/used to have a penis.



xoxo,



Me

Okay Then


New word alert. I'm a big fan of Jonathan Ames, and he's done much writing about his obsession with transsexuals. In a compilation of his essays and anecdotes, I encountered this word:

Trannsy (noun, plural: trannsies)
1. A transsexual who chooses not to get sexual reassignment surgery.
Origin: "Transitioning." It is probably from some skeezy chick-with-a-dick hooker who stands to make more money with a cock than without.
Example: Ericatoure Aviance says many of her tricks insist that she fuck them, so she's opting to keep her weiner.