Magical

Thank you, Stephen K of Hard Liquor, Soft Holes!

Wisdom

Bruce Lee once said something along the lines of "kicking someone in the head is like punching someone's foot."  Unless you ARE Bruce Lee's zombie ghost or Chuck Norris, don't bring your fancy cross-kicks to a street fight.

It's Official

I've been named.  If I were to be adrag queen, I shall be: Tina Faygala.  A Jewess drag queen.  It's perfect.

And the Children Went UP!

This is jaw-dropping.  First of all, this bitch Leigh Bowery is working some nerves.  That scary serial killer face with the patchwork hippy clown ensemble is insane.  HER FACE.  Good lord, her face.  And then it happens.  It goes from uncomfortable performance to performance ART.  You'll know when you see it. 



I finally watched the drag classic, Wigstock.  It's fun and the shows are great, but it was so short!  At only one hour and fifteen minutes, this documentary needed to be doubled.  My other big problem is that so few of the dragsters are featured.  Where's my Varla?  And where the fuck is Lahoma van Zandt?!?  You can also spook a pre-op Candis Cayne as one of the Wigstock Dancers, and giiiiiirl, she was rough.  She's pretty now, but damn she has had some good work done.  Her barbecue was canceled fa sho (on account of a FUCKED UP GRILL).  Much love though.  It's fun to see the different stages of transformation.  And there's RuPaul with her fantastically cinched waist and youthful face (this was 1993 after all).  One last thing:  God bless Lady Bunny's corset.

Silver Fox?

I found something disturbing this weekend:  my first grey hair.  My brother claims he found one a few months ago, but I think it was just an excuse to snatch my weave out.  This little grey fella is just chilling all by himself on the side of my head.  It's long too, so it's been in the works for a while.  I don't know how I didn't notice until just now.  I'd rather be grey than bald, so I'm hoping this is a new trend instead of hair loss.  I'll take Anderson Cooper over Joey Lawrence.  Maybe Lil' Grey will invite his friends and start a little patch.

Textual Intercourse

My brother: I didn't see Brittany Murphy's name in the cast list for Sin City 2, did she get in a fight with Robert Rodriguez?

Me: I heard she's doing a zombie movie instead.  That, or Weekend at Bernice's.

Brother: Really?  Why? That's dumb.  She has a shitty career as it is, sin2 would be a step up.

Me: well, anything is a step up from her current career.  She could do porn, but she might have been cremated.  Maybe someone could mix her up and use her as an enema or douche.

Brother: wait what?! cremated!? did she die?!

Me:  oh i thought it was a clever joke. that bitch died many months ago

Brother: oh shit, I forgot.  Oops, how is Sin City 2 going to keep going?

Me: yeah (EYEROLL) she was so vital

That's Nice

Here's the question: is it blowjobby or watersportsy?  Either way it's hot and awkward.

Tranny Baby Alert

Babies shouldn't have DSL.

I don't know what's happening here, but I approve.  The headline might as well read "baby's first time up in drags walking a ball."  She will definitely snatch a trophy.  She's got some fierce Kate Gosselin (whoa, what happened to her?  Totally forgot until I saw this coiffure) hair, and she is WORKING the cholita eyebrows.

Narsty

I don't know what exactly is going on with her pit situation.  She needs to shave and find a deodorant that doesn't leave white streaks.  Get yourself learnt, bitch.

Ooooh She Shady

Here's Tim Gunn feeling the cunt.

Today's Lesson

My tranny hooker boots!  My God!  I can't move my tranny hooker boots!

I am so embarrassed.  Somehow I never knew the true origin of the word "tranny."  It's a diminutive of transvestite, not transsexual.   Transvestism generally only implies crossdressing.  Transsexualism is simply when someone identifies with a gender other than his biological sex.  Maybe I did know this, but I've forgotten.  I'm having memories from a book that referred to transgendered people (fucking hell, don't even get me started on transgendered vs. transsexual; my fragile mind can't handle that right now) going through the transition as "transies."  That's a little advanced, and it just doesn't soothe my ears like TRANNY. 

What started this was GLAAD throwing a fit over a kid saying tranny in an episode of Glee.  The kids were to put on The Rocky Horror Show, and Mike Chang backed out of playing the "sweet transvestite" Frank 'N' Furter because his parents didn't want him "dressing up like a tranny."  GLAAD's Matt Kane commented that "unfortunately the larger problem here is that the word “tra**y” has become an easy punch line in popular culture, and many still don’t realize that using the term is hurtful, dehumanizing and associated with violence, hatred and derision."  First of all, if you're going to play grown up, use the real word.  If it is so polarizing, don't give it power by fearing to even write it.  "Tranny" is not Voldemort.  Secondly, I strongly believe that epithets can be used to highlight ignorance.  Okay, Mike Chang's parents don't want him to dress like a tranny.  Ha ha ha.  But what is that really saying?  It's showing that his parents are so closed-minded that to them, even playing the part of a tranny is unacceptable.  I don't really see anything wrong with referring to people as trannies.  If a female friend is wearing terrible makeup and a bad outfit, yes, I will tell her she looks like a tranny.  In an old episode of Glee, Finn says "fag" to Kurt, and it was a very powerful use of the word which emphasized Finn's own issues and insecurities.  Invectives can serve a higher purpose than just making us laugh.

This Is Cute

I think I randomly found this from someone's Twitter page.  I like eery and slightly disturbing stuff like this:
His Face All Red

Tranny McGuyver

Enough said.

Songs That Make Me Happy

My favorite 80s song: