Wednesday, August 11, 2010

Too Good



I happened to ask on my Twitter account (@FatCamp) on August 5 "how does bonnie hunt still have a show?" I just noticed that someone (@Imontheradio) replied @ me that she does not in fact have a show anymore. Apparently it is in reruns until September 10. And then "I take it by your question you're not a Bonnie Hunt fan." I had to go back and see what I actually wrote, because I had it in my head that I wrote something like "why the fuck is that no-talent cunt Bonnie Hunt still on the air?" What I did tweet was completely benign, but what I really want to know is how Stephanie Foo happened across my tweet. We either have some followers in common, or (what I'm convinced is more likely:) she for some searched all of Twitter for Bonnie Hunt. Why would someone do that?? It is mind-boggling. When you do that search, what are you hoping to find? The hot juicy gossip on all things Bonnie Hunt?

Oh hahaha. Well, after a minute's worth of research, I see that Ms. Foo is just a superfan of BH. There are several @Imontheradio tweets on BH's page. I kind of want to bait Foo now. I just need to come up with something AWFUL to say about Ms. Hunt and wait for the magic to happen.


Sweet Dreams


I had a dream last night that I was taking part in one of those Food Network sugar competitions. I just remember pulling a packed sugar figurine out of a mold along with my co-chef (a sassy black woman of course). It was a little less than a foot tall, and it was our prototype. We knew if it went well, we would be making many more. It was a sugar statuette of Bea Arthur, complete with shoulderpads, gown shape, and what would eventually be a sequins clutch purse. This bitch was ready for the big charity ball! Sidenote: damn, those old bitches were always going to charity balls. Imagine how many jersey sequins super-scoop-neck-to-the-knee tops and floor-length skirts those twats had. !!! I know, right? I remember thinking that it was shaped so well and all we had to do was airbrush it. The interesting part was that it must have been brown sugar. I guess we were making Black Bea Arthur. You know that exclamation (well, you nerds might) "Merlin's beard?" Well, I want to start saying "Bea Arthur's beard!" It's not "fetch," I'm going to make this happen.