Friday, March 4, 2011

Let's Make It Happen

amen, sister

If you don't read my tweets, I coined the word "abominortion." I submitted it to Urban Dictionary, but those assholes have rejected my last two submissions. Although I did get angelmaker approved once upon a time. Here you have my definition:

A portmanteau of abomination and abortion. That which is offensive and should never have existed in the first place.

Totally useful, right? I'm going to need your help in literally spreading the word. Use it every appropriate chance you get.  Anyway, you heard it from me first.  So when it blows up, you know where it came from. 

Sir Charlie Sheen

snatched from

He was knighted, right?  This motherfucker has been so entertaining in a very sad way.  He's the new Lindsay Lohan, but at least you can tell she's a liar and knows deep down she's fucked up.  This man is "WINNING!"  And I'm already so damn sick of hearing people say "winning."  Two and Half Men is the worst; and he seems to be a fucking hurricane of shit, destroying everything he touches.  He truly is an abominortion.  Can we just go back in time and abort Charlie Sheen?

Anyway, here is a fun mashup of New Yorker cartoons and the ramblings of a chemically imbalanced celebrity with too much money for his own good:

Charlie Sheen Quotes As New Yorker Cartoons

My Next Drag Name

I'm mentioned before that I'm always on the lookout for drag personas.  I have a good one.  My name will be Ruth Lesscunt.  Get it?  It works on two levels; I'm so clever!  Eyeroll.  Anyway, I would of course base my look on Ruth Gordon's Minnie character from Rosemary's Baby.  All terrible, poorly applied makeup, housefrocks, and huge hair curlers.

Best Joke Ever

Aside from most Helen Keller jokes that is.  I modified this from statement form in a tweet by @RMGingerNinja:

What did the Jewish pedophile say to the child?
-"Hey little kid, wanna BUY some candy?"